16 May 2010

I DON'T WORK FOR GOOGLE!

DEAR GOOGLE: I AM NOT EMPLOYED BY YOU!
(but I'd love an internship in about two years!)

It is not that big of a deal... but it is! Years ago, I decided to make a blog. It started out as a KD Productions blog, but after a while, I didn't really have much to say about KD Productions and started posting things in the technology world that I thought were really neat. That eventually evolved into simply a blog on Google. The wonderful world of Google and all the wonderful things they were doing. In fact, I was the first one of the major bloggers to post about Google's acquisition of YouTube (that was a big day for my blog). On average, my blog attracted 300 viewers a day. I felt pretty special!
Well, in November of 2006, I decided to stop it. It was taking too much of my time. So, I stopped blogging. Throughout all of this blogging however, people started to get the impression that I was a "Googler" (a Google Employee). I started to get e-mails giving me suggestions on how Google should improve their services. So I made a big list of all the different services of Google and how to contact them, and posted on that... It didn't really help. People still kept sending me e-mails. I wasn't too bothered, a little flattered to hear from one of my "admiring fans!" :P
Time went on, still, after I'd stopped blogging, I would still get these e-mails, I just responded to them telling them of the error and apologizing for the confusion. Time went on even more and I left on my mission. When I returned, I obviously had a huge amount of e-mails in both my personal and business accounts. I simply deleted all the e-mails I'd received while I had been away (but not the ones before!) and started my life on the cyber-scene again... Unfortunately, the e-mails haven't stopped! I still get several e-mails a month asking me to improve some Google service! This is one of the more recent ones:

Hi Ken!

I found your contact information online, and I felt like I needed (and I mean needed-that's no exaggeration) to vent about the new interface. It's terrible. I hate it. It feels like I'm using Bing. Someone over there needs to be ashamed of themselves. It's a sad, sad day when I'm complaining about Google. Google has been a welcome portal to endless knowledge and distraction. Now, it just feels gross. It also feels disreputable (yes!), ineffective, and inaccurate in it's searches. While it may actually be searching more efficiently, because I associate the layout with inferior search engines I can't help but believe that Google is less than what is was. It's likely watching Elizabeth Taylor get old. All that beauty and promise...wasted. Don't make a "Cleopatra"!, Google. It's not too late. Oh, and please move that stupid sidebar.

I realize that my email will have little to no impact and this isn't personal. I'm sure you're hardworking, wonderful Google employee, Ken.

All the best,


Adrienne Cain

Obviously, he is unaware that I do not work for Google. So, I'm not entirely sure what to do about this, I still haven't made a generic e-mail response for when I get those kinds of e-mails but I think I will one day soon. One thing that I have done is added a tally to keep track of how many of these kinds of e-mails I receive. You'll see it on the side-bar on the right, at the bottom.
Anyway, that's what's going on in my life. It's alright! I'll live! And THAT'S the Bright-side of life!

4 comments:

Karissa said...

Find out how to contact google and pass the info on. Who knows, maybe they will hire you? That'd be pretty awesome!

Kent Dodds said...

I'd love to do that, but the reason that I get the e-mails in the first place is they have searched to see how to contact Google and I'm all they can find. Hmmm... There are some of my old fellow bloggers though, maybe I could ask them how they avoid e-mails like this...

Lisa said...

Hahahaha--this is really funny. :)

Kim and Jim said...

So, KEN, while you are fixing all of Google's problems, could you please solve the problems of world peace and hunger, too? LOL!!!!!